confused?

i don't know about you , but i definitely am. its literally 2 in the morning and i am sitting here at the heart of the unit which is this wooden table right in the middle of the living room, all alone. basically, i am here once again, because i have nowhere else to go. and i am confused. why? why? why does it have to be the freaking ME, who is always confused.?

well, here goes, i am confused about my actions. you see, sometimes, my actions aren't really what is right to my heart and sometimes, when thought of carefully, they are not necessarily logical or even sensible. okay that last part didn't even make sense. anyways, thats what i am talking about, i am here again, with my Maths past year questions laying right in front of me but i have no mood to do it. no mood in the sense i look at the questions and look away with my mind drifting off somewhere else. i hate this feeling. its icky and irrelevant but i really don't know how to make it go away.

and oh yeah, the confusion kicked in like some time last week or something. i have good friends. wait, thats a lie. i have GREAT friends. but sadly, i kinda think i am more complex than what they view me as. the complexity is very difficult to be explained. i don't know. i just don't know. and you know i might not lock myself in the room and blast the radio and then scream or anything but technically, thats what i truthfully want to do at times. you know why? because sometimes, i just can't say things that go on in my head for it will complicate things.

ohhh well, at least i have you guys to vent out to.