.a question to all.....

i am confused. whether to listen to my friends who are asking me to differ NS and go for college or to go for NS like i planned earlier......its like...why you want to go and waste time there when you can join a college and start early.....and my dad is like it will be a new experience, go for it... i am confused.......

i am really dumbfounded. help me.....what do you guys think.....should i go or not?

i am gonna try and stay calm but.................

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IT'S ALL OVER, BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i am who i am

i have been called a lot of things; an ogre, a gorilla, a girl, a chicken, a weirdo and why even a nonsenscical jerk. but i am non of those. i am who i am. who am i? good question. aren't we all trying to find the best answer possible for that?

i dunno lar. i am confused. why? i don't know. about what? i don't know. i just came back from a fren's palce and i feel like crap. its like i have not been acting my age. u know its like one moment i am the happiest man on earth and the next i have sunk to the deepest of the seas. am i acting my age?

its like i have to u know....some how....be 17 but according to people i am still acting like i am in lower secondary or sumthin like that. i dun even know what i am typing this for.....

what do u guys think......am i supposed to be who i am or be the grown up guy everybody expects of me??????

unknown number.....

there was this moment
you were sitting next to the person beside me
and i was wondering
will we still be frens
after our time in secondary school

we laughed
we talked
we joked
and we ate

then suddenly
my phone vibrates
i looked at the unknown number
called that number
but no one answered

we continued laughing
we continued talking
we continued joking
and then again
the unknown number

i ignored it this time
before i knew it
it was time to bid farewell
for the lunch was over

everybody started moving
i looked around
searching for a friend
of ten years
then i see him

gladly stood beside him
and i saw his family
heading towards the exit
he said bye
i said bye

he looked at me
and smiled
"it was me"
he said showing
his phone

i laughed
and slapped him
on his shoulder
"how dare you"
i asked, smiling

then he left.....
after that i left too.

the four letters...

the four letter word,
is it true?
or is it just another myth.
long i stand here,
waiting and believing,
also hoping that it is.

would she come?
what if she doesn't?
what do i do?
do i go back?
or do i stay and wait?
wait for time to pass
and with it,
my youth.

stares thrown at me,
like daggers,
stick out on the outside,
even more painful
blunt daggers of fear,
start bludgeoning
my poor fragile heart.

glancing left and right,
i take a step in front,
awaiting the saccharine smell,
those beautiful eyes,
her cascading silky black river,
the pearls her roses conceal,
the touch of her wet petals.

consoling my weeping heart,
i take a step back,
only to find out,
i had stepped on her
soft shy feminine calves,
magic sparked for
both our eyes locked,
and with it LOVE,
i kissed her,
right there and then.

guys i am a bad poet but i wanted to write something short and story-like but it kinda turned out as a poem....wait...i am not that sure whether it is poem or not....sorry if it pains to read this...hehehehehehehehheheh

didn't really want to pick out a tittle...

well, i feel bad for not studying the amount i am suppose to. having said that, i am truly seeing new personalities (who are not that new anyway) who are popping out like mushrooms out of no where. no...no... they were there before but i didn't really notice them.

first of....

Barack Obama..
i love the way he delivers a speech and i truly think that he has the power (and brains) to change the world. i am also inspired by the way he holds himself high, even though odds are against him. i do not really like politics but as far as it goes, he is truly a magnificent character who i think is one of the best leaders we have in our generation. i took notice of him recently, when there was a brouhaha about a comment he made about the police force. and then decided to youtube him and i heard a speech he gave on changing the world. it was awesome.

will smith (i know you are thinking, whats up with me and african american guys?? aren't you?)
well, i saw him on oprah and sure i loved his movies way before that. he is just so cool, calm , collected and crazy at times. and have you heard him laugh .......ohhhhh...you should....then you will be laughing at and with him. it is just so funny. i love the way he talked about his kids, and life and everything he said on the show was just so apt at that moment. i don't know why but i was depressed when i was watching the show but when the show ended my spirit was uplifted.

dhilip varman...(i am sorry for you if you haven't heard him sing...sorry also if you don't understand the language he sings in..tamil.)
he is this awesome indian singer in malaysia. i heard his songs and fell in love with all of them..i really can't believe that we have a singer that good. i also love the way he sings live. he is so genuine when he gives interviews.....and i also love the fact that he didn't give up after losing in a competition and is now even more famous than the girl who won.

i really can't believe that i didn't notice these guys before. well, they are just great...i don't really know why i am blogging about nonsense like these which you already know about (most of you all...anyway).. but this is MY blog...... so you know i just felt like writing something like this. cheao.... ppl..(for now)

the BEST birthday ever.....

alright, i just came back from the best surprise birthday party one could ever get. seriously, i did not expect it.

it all started yesterday, when clement told me that we have a Mighty Minds meeting at his house. so i was like

" do we really have to have the meeting?" and he was like " hey competition is in like few weeks, you know."

and then i was like " okay lar...but why tomorrow?" and then shaki was like " other days got tuition lar,". and so i gave in and said that i would go.

so today, after school, i rushed home and bathe and rushed to clement's house. (i brought my dog, Lucky, because they really wanted to see it, in the car). and then, when i reached his house, he was getting ready to go somewhere. he later explained that shakilan had no transport and he was going to fetch him. just when he was about to finish saying that, hannah came out of his house.

i was like "what are you doing here?" ( i was suspicious by then, though)

she was like "we had to finish up some last minute work given by miss claire."

well, i kinda believed her because it was really possible. then clement explained that he was going to drop hannah off and pick up shaki at the same time. so it would have been awkward to stay in his house without him. later, he invited me to go with him.

so i went along. clement's mum was driving and she drove into the lane where KFC was situated. they got out of the car....

and i was like "why you guys getting out of the car,"

and then they said something that i couldn't catch. so i got out......

and then i saw yu chen standing at the entrance inside KFC. i was like AHHHHHHHH....i couldn't believe it. i figured it out then.

they had organised a surprise bithday party for me.....for me. OMG...omg....i was staring at clement like a weirdo and he was just smiling and pulling me into KFC. and then we went upstairs where almost all my close friends were. chin chin, carolyn, kee wen, ying ying, yu chen, andrew, and then later shakilan and chee jong joined in. there were snack plates on each place and then they were all smiling and wishing me HAPPY BIRTHDAY. wow....they are like so ....cool and .....just ....wow...... GREAT FRIENDS.

and then shakilan brought the chocolate cake in. it was so large. i didn't even know how to cut it, hannah had to help me. i mean seriously where can you get friends like mine. i have to say that i am very lucky to have them. clement, seriously you are the best, along with shakilan, carolyn, and hannah. can't believe these guys actually managed to keep it in dark till today. later i found out that they were planning this for over a week now. and all those weird moment and questions here and there made sense. it fit just so perfectly.

guys, i am very fortunate to have friends like you. i was dumbfounded today and just for the record, this was the best birthday i have ever celebrated. i couldn't have wished for a better one. you guys rock. lets keep our fingers crossed that we will be best friends forever. ahhh...to heck with the fingers...we know we will be best friends till the end of time. thank you so much.